Editor's Note: Knowing your articles of clothing can get you out of a bind, so you might as well read this and practice a little.

How to Recognize a Pair of Pants

Determining a pair of pants is considered by many to be a tricky and risky business. It can be intimidating to some, however this article will help you to conquer this fear and become a certified PRP (Pants Recognizing Person).


1. Live in a place where pants are worn. Be careful not to attempt this in an area where you will not be able to locate a pair of pants.

2. Study the tips below for details that distinguish pants from other articles of clothing.

3. Find a public area, such as a movie theater, where pants are readily available for study.

4. Casually stroll around this area and try to name aloud whether or not the article of clothing you're looking at is pants, i.e. "Pants, no pants, pants, pants…"

5. Repeat step 4 at least 500 times.

6. Congratulations! You are now a certified PRP! Have fun and enjoy those pants!


* Things that may look like pants, but are not include: capris, shorts, long socks, stockings, skirts, bikinis, and naked people. Try to remember the differences between them, mainly that they all to not cover the knees, which is the best recognition sign of pants.

* If you are spotted pants-looking: RUN. Do not look back and leave the area immediately.

* Bring friends to help you spot pants with you. Consider designating a day for recognizing pants, or several if you prefer. For instance, on Wednesdays, you and your friends can plan to find pants all day.

* Make it fun! Although it can be stressful during the summer months to find and recognize pants, count the number of pants each of you can correctly identify. Whoever wins gets a free set of office supplies!


* Do not attempt to spot pants in warmer areas of the world. Doing so may prove overly difficult, and sometimes fatal.

 Things You'll Need

* Sunglasses (optional)

* Clothes to wear

* Pants vision

Article Added: 27 June 2009

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If you spot a leg,
pants may be close
at hand.

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