Editor's Note: Go in the monster lab and get busy.

How to Make a Creation Just Like Victor Frankenstein

Learn how to cheat death, and create life like Victor Frankenstein.


1. Study both the natural sciences, and the supernatural sciences of Agrippa and Magnus.

2. Find an isolated apartment near your local university. You'll need plenty of space for your workshop and storage.

3. Discover the source of life. While this is a great achievement, be sure to remain clandestine on the matter. If you do recount it to an English Sea Captain during a trip to the Arctic, remain as ambiguous as possible.

4. Use a combination of beautiful body parts found in charnel houses and medical labs to put together a body. 8 foot is the ideal dimension, though size may vary.

5. On "a dreary night in November", place the monster near a window or on the roof.

6. Take advantage of a lightning storm, or some other electric spark, to infuse life into your monster.

7. Wait several minutes. If the experiment was successful, the creature should open its dull yellow eyes.

8. The creature should turn out horribly ugly, and you should be disgusted with both it and yourself.

9. Run away, and wait to meet it again on a snowy mountain top.


* While November is ideal, late October is also acceptable. However, DO NOT WAIT UNTIL DECEMBER. These cold conditions are not ideal.

* Living with roommates will complicate the experiment. Isolation is best, though you might need a visitor afterwards to nurse you back to health.


* You might become pale and sickly, lose interest in other hobbies, and cut off communication with your family and fiance.

* Your creature could become bitter and violent, and end up murdering your loved ones.

* The creature might also desire a companion, so don't throw away leftover materials!

 Things You'll Need

* Body parts

* Electricity

* Knowledge of Science

* A laboratory

Article Added: 20 September 2010

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You weren't using that
old grill anyway.

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