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How to Be a Workaholic

Many workaholics suffer from stress, fatigue and sleeping disorders. Their compulsive desire to be constantly working can make a huge impact on their social life. Still want to be one? Read on.


1. Get a demanding job. There is usually a high expectation and it is much easier to be a workaholic by having an employer that keeps you manned to the desk many hours a day.

2. Arrive early at work, as soon as the building, etc. is open. Try to get hold of a 24-hour card. Also be the last to leave.

3. Let people see you working through meals. Buy take-away food and eat idly while frantically typing. Make sure your eyes are extremely focused, but glazed.

4. Take stacks of paperwork home. You want your house to be an obstacle course mess.

5. Never return your calls. Your social life will be non-existent anyway because of your snappy replies and rude behaviour due to your constant working.

6. Alienate your family. Your parents will be particularly worried. Send them emails at 2 a.m. describing your hectic schedule and how hard you are working. Perhaps add your poor pay.

7. Be incredibly responsible to the point that you are a pencil-neck.

8. Push away all signs of intimate relationships! You will be repellent to men/women anyway.


* People should be telling you to quit your job or 'relax'.

* You shouldn't have a social life.

* Romance is a barrier to being a workaholic!

Article added: 18 April 2011

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